Thursday, September 23, 2010

and on it goes

Survived birthday number two with no dad. It was actually okay. Of course I was sad. Everyday is tinged with sadness no matter what. But it was a nice day.
I was spoiled by family and friends. Reminded over and over again how blessed I really am and how thankful I should be.
I really do have a great life.

I have slowly come to the realization (and this will be a long post another time) that God wasn't picking on our family when he let (for lack of a better term) my dad die. I still choose to love God and even though I've been angry and will probably never understand the why's of everything. I am still going to love the Lord.

It's the same thing as having an argument with my husband. We still love each other, and don't decide to get a divorce when we disagree about something or even don't like each other for awhile.
I am still a Christian (even though I sometimes don't want to be associated with others who call themselves that). I am not going to throw away my faith because my life hasn't gone the way I planned. Life is choosing joy, happiness, faith and sometimes accepting (not always liking) the things that come your way.
I am not alone in grief. Others are walking this with me and making it more bearable.

I was so lucky to have my dad for 26 years when others don't have one at all. I miss my dad so much because he was wonderful. So many others are not so lucky. I really was and am blessed.
I know I will see my dad again. Others do not have the same assurance.

So, for my 28th year, I am going to try to be positive and always see something bright everyday. Even when I don't feel like it...


  1. It's amazing for me to hear you share your journey since your dad died. I'm sure it's incredibly difficult for you, but you seem to be handling it with such grace. You really encourage and inspire me!

  2. You put it so well when you compared your love for God with a marriage relationship - that totally makes sense. I admire your strength, you are courageous and admirable, friend. Miss you.

  3. Hey Dana,
    It sounds like it has been a good birthday for you, and you've gained some perspective that has been helpful for you. I wish you a wonderful upcoming year!