Monday, March 15, 2010

conversations

This morning my son and I had to have a conversation about how Papa won't have any more birthdays or birthday parties because he is dead and in Heaven. He kept asking, "Cause Papa's dead?" and I would have to say, "yes, Papa is dead."
Did we not tell him this crucial piece of information? I still choke up when I talk to him about his Papa. He's always been told his Papa is in Heaven now, and we've read books about Heaven and what it's like, but did we forget to mention that Papa died? Those days after my dad died are a blur, but I hope one of us sat down with my son and explained it to him. He was only two years old but toddlers are a lot smarter than we give them credit for.

We recently celebrated my brother's birthday and then shortly after that, had the little celebration of my dad's life. Soon we will celebrate my aunt's birthday.

I think all of this is confusing my son, thus all the questions about Papa's birthday.

I hope and pray that I am answering these questions correctly and won't further confuse my son.
Parenting is exhausting and I feel at a loss these days...

2 comments:

  1. Awe. I feel for you.

    One of the worst moments of my life was telling the boys that Grampa had died. Really... Just so completely awful in every way. And I miss my dad SO much, but some days I miss their grampa even more.

    Big HUGE (((HUGS))).

    There must be a book about helping children grieve. I'm going to take a look through Parables at Easter, because I'm with you in feeling completely lost when it comes to helping them.

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  2. I know this is late in coming but I got a book from the funeral home when MY kids were little. It is called "Saying Goodbye" by John K Saynor. Its like a "story/colouring book" that walks you and your child through the death & funeral of a loved one...
    I'm sure your local Funeral Home could acquire it, if asked. Hope this helps!
    T

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